A Pain in the #%$!

My adventure began about four and a half years ago.  My wife and I just had our third daughter three months prior, and we decided that it was time for a vasectomy.

When I was around ten years old, I was diagnosed with a varicocele.  I had it repaired when I was seventeen and gave it little thought until I told the urologist about my history when I was 34.  The good doctor advised me that there should be no issue when I had the procedure.

Sparing the details, I knew there was something wrong when I still had searing pain three days later.  I was supposed to be well enough for life by now.  The urologist thought I was malingering, so it was time for a new urologist.

This new doctor was tasked with undoing whatever harm may have been done by the previous doctor.  His best advice was to get an epididyectomy.  I was in so much pain, I underwent this procedure with little thought.  Recovery was elusive as I spent weeks in bed loaded on narcotics.

I was in bed a couple of months when we determined I may be stuck with the sensation that I caught a golf club with my groin.  Naturally, it was time for pain management specialists to figure out how to cure me or to feed me enough OxyContin that I could eat them like skittles.  The obvious choice for the specialist was to feed me a drug cocktail that would practically induce coma for the average person, but it barely took the edge off.

During this time I also made several trips to Lubbock, TX to receive experimental RF (radio frequency) treatments to burn my ilioinguinal nerve.  The very first treatment was promising.  The team of doctors said that if the treatment was successful, I could expect to be pain free up to six months before I would need another treatment.

I was wheeled away to the operating room and was stabbed in my lower abdomen with a long needle that felt like a railroad spike.  Once the needle was in contact with the angry nerve, it was time to burn it with RF pulses.  This procedure was agonizing, but in recovery I could see that it worked!  I was pain free and it was time to celebrate.  About an hour later though, I could feel the pain creeping back in.  I underwent three or four more of these hopeless procedures over the next few months and during this time I was either missing work or laying in bed every moment outside of work.

My pastor knew what I was dealing with and advised me to go to a specialist in Temple, TX.  This new urologist has treated people with similar problems and said an orchiectomy is the best course of action.  He also said he would sever the ilioinguinal nerve while he was operating.  He was certain I would not feel anything when I woke up from surgery.  I awoke with severe pain, but it was still considerably better than usual.

By this time I was unable to work and spent my days resting and praying.  Over the course of about a year I could feel that my condition had improved and my daily life is now bearable.

I still have pain everyday.  It gets worse with physical activity and a flare up can last several days.  I also have other chronic pain issues that probably stem from this trauma.  I have an appointment with a rheumatologist next month to explore my new conditions.  What’s important is that I have some semblance of life again.  I know my relationships suffer and I’ll probably never have a normal full time job again, but I’m no longer chained to the bed or opiates.

My advice for all men:  Never, never get a vasectomy.