I was on my way home from a Mercy Chefs deployment in Van, TX and had planned on stopping at Stanley’s in Tyler, TX. They have excellent barbecue. In fact, I’d say they have the only barbecue in fifty miles. All other claimants in the area do not produce barbecue, but an abominable imposter. Sadly, Stanley’s is closed on Sundays, so I had to think fast and settled on Mooyah Burgers, Shakes & Fries. I won’t make that mistake again.
I was encouraged when I saw fresh cut fries on the menu. I also thought the burgers looked promising. I was thinking about Five Guys fries and a punched up burger as I consider five Guys’ burgers as consistent, yet average. If I hadn’t shelled out eleven bucks for a burger, fries, and a drink, I could have better enjoyed an otherwise unenjoyable burger.
The bun was soft and squishy like an old lady’s flabby neck (I mean this in the most complimentary way). The size of the party was impressive. The sheer number of available toppings and sauces were unmatched. The flowing grease mustn’t be confused with juiciness, though.
At first, I actually thought I was assaulting an incredibly juicy burger, but the unpleasant liveresque aftertaste coupled with grease that coated my throat, I quickly realized that I had stumbled into a nightmare. I’m not opposed to excessively greasy burgers, but this was no enhancement. This was obscenity on a bun. This was equivalent to grazing on a minefield of back acne.
If you want some tasty fries, Mooyah will satisfy. If you are still lusting for decadence, pass on the burger and get a peanut butter and banana concrete at Andy’s Frozen Custard down the street.