Best. Guacamole. Ever.

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The lighting wasn’t the greatest, but this avocado mash was a delightful guacamole green.

There was a time when I held great disdain for guacamole. I just scraped it off my Mexican food. Even the scrapings of guacamole would make me burp guacamole flavor. I don’t know if there is ever a time when a guacamole belch is pleasant.

Maybe a year ago, a friend offered some guacamole. My immediate reaction was to refuse it but something inside told me to try it. I dipped a chip and I was hooked. I ate all of his guacamole.

I don’t make it all the time because avocados are kinda pricey and I sometimes get irritated at the ten minutes of effort to make it.

Bear in mind that I cannot stand cilantro. I can detect it in the most minute amounts. It is an indescribable flavor that makes me think of well, I can’t describe it. If you choose to add cilantro don’t tell me about it as it makes me seethe with rage. The moment when David Banner’s eyes turn a scary whitish blue. Or is it bluish white?

Here’s my take on guacamole:

4 avocados
1/2 onion, minced
4 peperoncini, minced (I used Mezzetta brand)
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon parsley
1/2 teaspoon fresh ground pepper
1 teaspoon Tony Cachere’s
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon cumin
4 ounces corn
8 ounces kidney beans
1/2 can Rotel with habaneros
Juice from 1/2 lime

Peel and mash avocados. If you are a guacamole champion, you will leave some chunks in it. Add all ingredients and mix well. Normally, I mince a fresh Serrano instead of pickled peppers, but I use what I have on hand. If you try the Mezzetta peperoncinis with dill and garlic, you’ll be impressed. Crazy Tasty. Without the SPAM. Someday I may show you my quadruple decker SPAM sandwich. Or is it quintuple? Yeah, I’m pretty sure I have heart disease.

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8 thoughts on “Best. Guacamole. Ever.”

    1. I dunno what made me suddenly like it, but this is similar to what my friend had made. The blend of textures really is appealing to me. There is the creaminess of the avocado, the crunchiness of the corn, and the beanyness of the beans.

      Guac may be your kryptonite, though. Mine is broccoli. Smelling it makes me wretch.

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      1. Guacamole just seems ‘meh’ and what’s-the-point? to me. I don’t think I have a kryptonite veggie. Broccoli? C’mon, Ted! Oh well, I have some folk in my family who are w-a-y worse. It’s like “Well what can I feed you!”

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